nth worth believing in

just read through all his blogposts.logged into his acc and started reading them one by one.
they were all abt when he was with her.
i dont know if im regretting my decision to reread them.
my tears were flowing and srsly, it hurt more thn i expected.
i thot i cld handle it, tt i wldn be affected by th things sooo long ago.
i promised him i wldn let my thots wander but im sry.
all th things he did for her, all he felt cause of her.. theyre making me feel tt she's REALLY loved. =
im nt jealous of her tho i keep saying so. i guess im just fking hurt by how he cld really be a bf to her despite all i did.

im sorry baby. i cant help but think tt perhaps..
perhaps im just nt th one for u. if u really loved me, u cldve put in ur all lk u did for her. one day th right gal for u gna come along & when tt happens, just go ok?
maybe this whole thing was a mistake which is to be realised later on but till thn.. we'll just treasure th tyme we hav yea?

her ex wanted her back and was going all out to get her.
he said he wldn giv up & didn.
my exS want me back too. all u can say is "go lor",knowing tt i wldn. but wad if i really leave one day? wld u hold me back? or wld u have ceased to see th point to seeing tt i chose to give up first?
u wld wake up early in th morning to go out simply because she wanted u to.
getting u to go out w me... i think i dont have to continue.
& getting so worked up over th smallest things abt her, spamming her w msgs..
"sorry i lazy to reply"

fk.. im really sorry bii. i noe this post gna hurt u loads but i just need to vent my innermost feelings somewhere. & i need to stop crying.
i hate feeling inferior to other girls. & it's fking stupid coz it's so long ago alr.
im sorry bt i cant help it.
and for lying tt it's fine whn i cried real bad after reading ur msg.

u said "baby.. im sorry huh..sorry for treating u so badly.. as compare to my other rs uh.. i noe it is differest.. it isnt bias or anth uh.. i just dont hav th enthu to do all this stuff again uh.. i dno how uh"
i really wanted to be frank. initially, i wanted to vent it on u.
i wanted to tell u all tt i said above and how i feel tt im nt th one for u afterall but i didnt want u feel worse/ nt rest properly.
still, i really meant it when i said u dont have to be lk th way u were with her last time.
i still love u lots. love me too k?
yingting doesnt wna lose james wee=(

feeling btr by quite alot after th vodka & ranting.
i swear im a lousy drinker. either tt or vodka sucks.

goodnights. enough of crying.

yting l.

Give me presents on 09/10. I love rings, ice-cream, chocolate, candies, piercings & pretty little things.

love lies.

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