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Sunday, April 01, 2012
because i just realised how scarily materialistic i am. yes, after i suddenly started sobbing over how broke i am. ive always hated holding back whn i want to buy something or dine in a more expensive place. ive never liked having to decide what to eat or categorize what i want into what's necessary and what's an extravagance. sounds pretty normal right? i mean, who doesnt want financial freedom? but financial freedom is subjective. some ppl are happy with being able to spend within their personal limits. what im going for just isnt the case. I love shopping, and my definition of shopping, brands are involved. luxury brands to be exact. I just dont like what everybody has/ can have, see? bt i noe damn well tt with my qualifications, attitude etc, i probably hv to work real hard for it. and being the lousiest sort of woman anyone can ever meet, i dont believe in this method because more often thn not, ppl slog their guts out and be content with the single branded bag they get at the end of the day. lk WOW! UR EFFORTS PAID OFF FINALLY? see that keyword? i sound like a bitch for this and whatever else follows but ive always wished i died earlier or was never born because of my looks, height and figure plus nt hving th money to make changes to them as and when i want to. i actually wished my mum hadnt married my dad because she actually had richer suitors. so it would actually be a much richer me or no me at all and that's fine as well because thn, the non-existent me doesnt have to feel miserable about my average (if u r generous) looks. In the latter whereby i wldve existed even if mum married a filthy rich guy, i would b much happier because i would never be in such a state. bt since i probably did not accumulate enough good karma, here i am sobbing my eyes out because i simply abhor being broke for so long. bt i guess it's a good thing because i learnt smth out of this sudden realisation. if this rs doesnt work out, im not getting married unless that guy's rich and willing to spend on me. i dont care if he's a flirtatious bastard as long as he manages to pay. for my expenses and compensation if he decides on a divorce. bt i mean, who will right? keep th wife who lets u have ur mistresses rather than marry a mistress who wld only divorce you and demand compensation for ur infidelity. this aside, i dont rly care if he's older thn me by a decade. anything at all as long as i no longer get to this pathetic state ever again. if i dont meet a second guy who ticks the right boxes, im staying single. simple enough. Because while women envy someone who marries a man that truly loves her, women envy the ones who marry into the lap of luxury even more. despite making snide remarks, deep down inside they covet what they do not have. So what's contentment? sldnt i feel ashamed for wallowing in self-pity whn im much btr off those in third world countries? it just happens that contentment to me, is knowing i cn always hv what i want whether i get it or not. e.g. i hv a bag but like another bag. i can afford the other one but i choose not to buy it because i feel that having my current bag is enough for me, not because i hv to plan ahead before splurging. ask the starving african kids. wld they ever be content with 1 meal a day? no. they would think "at least it wasnt like ytd i had no food" but it doesnt change the fact tt they are still hungry. |
yting l. 
Give me presents on 09/10. I love rings, ice-cream, chocolate, candies, piercings & pretty little things. love lies. A-H: caihong. charlene. dallas. dengyin. garyim. homing. I-R: jeryl. jhosy. jiaxin. jocelyn. kerry. linjia. michelle. minee. mireen. munyee. noelle. peiwen. riwei:). S-Z: sally:). sherlyn. sinyeeL. vengyi. vivian weikaiN. winnie. xiaxue. May 2006 June 2006 July 2006 August 2006 September 2006 October 2006 November 2006 December 2006 January 2007 February 2007 March 2007 April 2007 May 2007 June 2007 July 2007 August 2007 September 2007 October 2007 November 2007 December 2007 January 2008 February 2008 March 2008 April 2008 May 2008 June 2008 July 2008 August 2008 September 2008 October 2008 November 2008 December 2008 January 2009 February 2009 March 2009 April 2009 May 2009 June 2009 July 2009 August 2009 September 2009 October 2009 November 2009 December 2009 January 2010 February 2010 March 2010 April 2010 May 2010 June 2010 July 2010 August 2010 September 2010 October 2010 November 2010 December 2010 January 2011 February 2011 March 2011 April 2011 May 2011 June 2011 July 2011 August 2011 September 2011 October 2011 November 2011 February 2012 April 2012 May 2012 July 2012 August 2012 September 2012 October 2012 November 2012 Designer : Chili. x o x o |